Disclaimers: No profit; only fun.
This story may not be posted elsewhere with the consent of the author.
Vin was anxiously looking forward to the weekend. He'd been home sick for most of the week, and now that he was feeling better he was restless and lonely. It was Friday night and Chris should be home soon. They had no other plans for the weekend than just being together.Home.
Vin smiled to himself, a feeling of warmth coming over him. He had lived his entire life as a loner from the moment his mother died when he was five until he had joined Team Seven of the ATF. With them he had gradually found a place to belong, friends..., family, even. He'd met a man and felt an instant connection the moment their eyes met across a crowded, chaotic warehouse floor.
Never in his young, hard life had Vin expected to find love, but in Chris Larabee he'd met the one true love of his life. It had overwhelmed him to realize that the powerful team leader loved him back, once the older man had stopped fighting against what he initially felt couldn't be true.
It had taken Chris a long time to accept the reality of his love for Vin, but then it had taken Vin far longer to let himself trust Chris. He'd lived a lifetime of being hurt and betrayed by others, and he wasn't going to let his heart be destroyed if for Chris this was merely a one-time fuck out of curiosity.
Larabee had always thought of himself as a persuasive, even forceful, person, but it had taken a lot of persuading and a lot of convincing to get the skittish Texan to take him seriously when he first indicated that he wanted more from Tanner than close friendship. Vin had been terrified that for Chris this was an experiment, a one-time shot to scratch an itch before he'd go back to 'real' relationships with women. Vin knew the team leader had been married, had had a wife and son. Tanner had been lied to and used before, but he knew that if Larabee betrayed him it would be the end not only of their friendship but also the end of his job as sharpshooter with the ATF.
To Vin's astonishment, their relationship had meant just as much to Chris as it did to him. The older man was exceedingly gentle and patient, never rushing Vin or pressuring him for more than he was willing to give. Vin had never been courted before, and he wasn't quite sure how to react. There had been others who lusted after Vin, seeing only the hair, the eyes, the gorgeous, lean body, and wanted to claim and possess him. These men had just taken what they wanted from him, then tossed him aside like so much garbage. When Chris finally convinced Vin that he was serious and in their relationship for the long haul, it had been one of the most magical and breath-taking nights either man had ever experienced.
Vin shook his head to think that he would never have believed them if someone had told him even a year ago that he would be living in a sprawling, beautiful home on a ranch with horses and a view of the mountains in the distance across a large expanse of open land. Even more unbelievable would have been the thought of living with an amazing man, the person who was everything he could have ever dreamed of and more. And never could he have even dreamed that this amazing person loved him back just as fiercely and protectively and all-encompassingly.
And now Chris Larabee, his boss, his best friend, ... his lover..., should be coming home soon.
*7*
Vin finished getting the meatloaf into the baking dish and was rinsing the mixing bowl when he heard Chris come in.
"Vin! I'm home," Chris called from the front door. Tanner heard him set down his briefcase and the rustle of fabric that let him know he'd be shrugging out of his long, black coat.
"Kitchen," he called back, rinsing his hands and reaching for a towel.
"Mmmm...," Chris breathed, coming up behind him and nuzzling under his ear as strong hands circled his body. Chris pressed his chest against the narrow back and hugged his lover to him. "Something smells good."
Vin's lips quirked.
"Ain't cookin' yet. Jist got it inta th' oven. Yer home early."
"Missed you. And I'm not talking about dinner."
"Yer not?"
"Nope. You smell good," Chris nuzzled his neck and Vin shivered.
"I'm 'wearin' eau d' Ivory Liquid..."
Chris chuckled and leered, shaking his head as he turned Vin around to face him.
"Uh," Vin blinked. "Yer early. Thought you might stop at th' saloon fer a beer with th' guys. Meatloaf's gonna take almost an hour t' cook..."
"Yeah...?"
"Mm hmm..."
"Could think of something to do in the meantime..."
Vin's dimples deepened as he grinned wickedly.
"Peel potatoes?"
Chris swatted his young Texan's tempting ass.
"Peel you!" he growled.
Vin's eyes widened further and he grew still. Chris couldn't tear his eyes away as the tip of that pink tongue peeked out as he licked his lips.
"'Kay," he swallowed.
Chris grinned ferally. It never failed to amaze him when he could turn his team's deadly sharpshooter into a romantically passionate lover. Chris pulled Tanner against him, his steel muscled arms holding the slender form tightly against him. His own tongue pushed into that warm, lush cavern and for what seemed like full minutes they were lost in exploration of what was achingly familiar, yet never old.
Tanner squirmed first, breaking contact and gasping for breath. Chris released the hold on his body, instead cupping Vin's flushed face gently in his large hands. He leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on those full, swollen lips.
Wide blue eyes stared at him.
"Damn, Cowboy," the raspy drawl sent quivers of need coursing through Larabee's body.
Chris could almost feel as a physical entity the love and trust emanating from the younger man. It amazed him to think how little affection Tanner had been shown as a boy, when he was so capable of giving everything of himself to their lovemaking. Tanner could be silent and hold himself with an unnatural stillness in a group, making himself nearly invisible. His shyness and hard-earned wariness had taken a long time to ease up when he was around the team, but still was in evidence with groups of people Vin didn't know well or didn't completely trust or feel safe with. Larabee smiled to think how no one would believe it if they knew Vin transformed into a real Texas wildcat in bed.
Chris bent lower, his mouth finding the place on Vin's neck near his collarbone that always drove him crazy. He felt the deep shudder run through the slender body as Vin gasped and moaned faintly. Long, hard fingers clutched at his shoulders, and Vin pressed closer. Chris continued his attack on the luscious neck, moving his face to nose the long, silken curls out of the way.
He pulled back, and Vin whimpered at the loss of contact. Chris smiled, his green eyes soft with love and affection for his partner. Vin tried to push closer for a brief moment until he realized that Chris was making room to push his flannel shirt off his shoulders. Vin's hands reached for the front of Chris's shirt, and he growled with frustration when strong hands gripped his wrists.
"Hold on, Cowboy," Chris said firmly, needing to get Tanner's attention. "You've ripped way too many of my dress shirts, and the ones you haven't ripped take way too much time sewing buttons back on - or trying to explain just why all the buttons are ripped off in the first place if I take them to be mended."
"I need..., Chris," Vin started, then stopped again. "I .., I want...,"
"What, Cowboy?" Chris asked gently. He carded his fingers through the baby-soft hair. "What do you want?"
Vin swallowed hard. A bright pink stain spread across the high cheekbones, and Vin ducked his head.
"Want you, Chris," he whispered. "I missed you so much. Jist bein' here without you w's startin' t' drive me crazy. I need you, Chris."
Chris was awed at the admission from his lover. Vin didn't often express his desire like that. He was always a willing partner when Chris initiated their love-making, and he had his own share of making the first move. But it was rare for Vin to say this many words at one time, and his shy hesitation was all the more endearing to the older man.
"Hey, I need you, too, babe. It's been a long week for me, too. I'm just sorry I couldn't be around more."
Vin's eyes raised to his and he looked genuinely confused.
"Why? You were here."
"I mean all the time. To be here more during the day."
"I w's fine," Vin frowned. "Hell, ain't never had no one t' take care a' me when I w's sick before. And you come home as early as ya could, sneakin' out early most days. Ya got me water an' Tylenol, made me soup. Ain't never felt so cared for."
"Still, I wish it was more."
"You know what I liked the best?" Vin asked, his soft voice raspy and hesitant.
"What?"
"When ya jist would sit with me, an' rub my back. An' when my skin hurt from fever, you'd sit there in bed beside me an' read 'r watch TV, 'r work on yer laptop. As much as I hurt, jist knowin' you w's there made me feel better."
Chris smiled, then kissed him.
"An' now somethin' else is hurtin'," Vin growled, "an' jist knowin' yer in th' same room ain't gonna do a damn bit a' good."
Chris laughed out loud and hastily finished unbuttoning his shirt and undoing the buckle on his dress slacks. He loved watching Vin's eyes darken with desire, and swallowed hard at the sight of Vin's tongue sneaking out, making his full lips glisten with moisture.
Larabee flung his own shirt to the floor, hesitating for just another moment as Tanner drank in the sight of his bare chest and torso. It gave him a feeling of power yet at the same time was humbling to see how his lover would drink in the sight of his body with pure adoration. It thrilled him to know that his stunningly attractive young lover thought he was so good-looking as well.
God, he loved Vin Tanner.
"Someone's still a mite overdressed in here," Chris growled.
He reached for the hem of Vin's henley shirt, pulling upward only to discover another tee-shirt underneath.
"Dammit, Tanner. Just how many layers are you wearing?"
Vin didn't answer as the shirts came up easily from his loose, low-slung jeans. Chris pulled them over his head, flannel shirt and all, only to stare in fascination as Vin shook his long hair back and away from his face and his eyes. The warm hands went to the warmer skin at Vin's belly, reaching for the buttons on his jeans. He stopped for a second in shock and looked up into Tanner's laughing blue eyes.
"One less layer than mebbe you w's expectin'?" he grinned at Larabee's surprise at finding that his young lover had gone commando.
"Come here, you."
Soon neither man could contain his passion, as Vin was stripped and Chris's shirt already pulled off and pants undone. Vin was moaning and whimpering, his cock hard and high against his flat belly. Holding Vin's waist securely between his hands for support, Chris moved them the few feet over to the heavy oak table. Vin's butt pressed against the edge of the polished wood, and Chris used his feet to spread Vin's legs further apart.
Chris's hands slid up the ladder of hard ribs, and his thumbs circled the tiny nipples. Vin moaned and his head arched back, exposing his neck and letting the soft tangle of curls drift down his shoulders. Chris bent and latched onto one nipple, teasing it with his tongue, then lightly blowing over it to watch it tighten into a sharp peak. His teeth nipped at it, then captured it gently while his tongue flickered over it.
"Chris..., now! Need ya now."
"Easy, pard. I gotcha... Gonna make it all good..."
"Chriiiisss....."
Chris pulled away from one nipple, and Vin gasped when he turned his attention next to the other one. As Chris continued his gentle torment of that one, Vin's hands were alternately kneading his upper arms and shoulders, and threading his long fingers through Chris's short, straight hair.
"Cain't ... last....," Vin gasped.
Chris swooped down, dropping to his knees, his warm mouth engulfing the head of Vin's cock. Vin shuddered and pushed forward into the incredible sensation of heat that surrounded his dick, as every nerve-ending seemed to flash like lightening toward his groin.
Whimpers and little gasps escaped from the younger man, and Chris's hands gripped his Texan's hips tightly to hold him still. Chris knew that Vin might thrust too hard without meaning to, and neither of them wanted him to choke.
Chris paid careful attention to the cock in his mouth, knowing what would drive his lover past the edge of passion. He licked the heavy vein underneath the full shaft, then relaxed his throat to take even more of the length. Vin was panting by then, his body breaking out in a sheen of sweat as his hands fisted tightly on the edge of the table. Chris knew he was close, and couldn't torment his lover any longer. It was too near to crossing the line between pleasure and pain. The blond hummed against the cock in his throat, and Vin exploded. Jets of cum shot into Chris's mouth, but he was ready and prepared, swallowing them all.
Vin's release went on and on, his body tensing and shuddering as his long-delayed passion found completion with his lover. Finally his cock softened and Chris swallowed the last few drops of cum as he let it slip from his mouth. He stood, powerful arms drawing the still shaking body close to him, his mouth finding and claiming Vin's. Tanner tasted himself on Chris's mouth, and he trembled as his hands clutched at Chris's biceps.
Chris broke contact of their kiss after what seemed like forever, lost in the sensations of the talented tongue of his lover. Vin sighed, and Chris grinned down into the still dark, lust- and love-filled eyes.
"Damn, Cowboy," he whispered, the soft rasp sending another jolt of passion straight to Chris's groin.
"Love you, Vin Tanner."
Vin smiled, shy and happy, the dimples creasing his still too thin cheeks as he flushed a soft shade of pink.
"Need you, Chris," he sighed. "Need you..., inside me."
Chris smiled, straight white teeth flashing.
"I thought you'd never ask," he teased.
Strong hands moved from Vin's back down to grab and squeeze Tanner's perfect ass. He spent some time rubbing and smoothing over the soft skin, feeling the hard muscles underneath. His hands teased at Vin's butt, pulling the cheeks apart and then squeezing them together.
Without warning he gripped Vin's ass tighter and lifted the younger man onto the table. Vin was startled, but then willingly let himself be lowered gently down on the polished wood to lay flat. He stared up at Chris, eyes sapphire blue as they grew wider at the sight of Chris standing above him.
Chris pushed Vin up slightly, getting him into the perfect position. He never lost his sense of amazement at how flexible Tanner was, and thought to himself that they certainly tried some pretty incredibly creative moves because of it. Now he gazed down, seeing his lover spread wide for him, and his breath grew quicker knowing the sense of trust and safety that allowed Vin to be so vulnerable. It was a trust that was given to him, and only him, and Chris knew that he would die before he betrayed that trust.
"Damn, Vin."
"Yer so beautiful, Chris."
"Hell, Tanner, I was just about to say the same thing about you."
Vin shook his head, clearing not believing it. Chris hoped that Vin wouldn't get self-conscious or shy, and he smoothed his hands over the hard muscles of Vin's thighs. He needed Vin to focus on what was important.
"Ain't nobody finer than you, Chris. Yer body's so perfect..., yer eyes and yer face. I love yer lips an' kissin' that little dip in the bottom one. Yer hair all spun golden... Damn, Cowboy. Kiss me?"
Chris leaned over the body of his lover, capturing the kiss-swollen lips. Tanner's hair spread out like a halo on the table, the golden caramel and reddish highlights glistening through the rich brown strands. Chris felt Vin's cock stirring, and his own was aching painfully. If he didn't pull away from Vin now, he was going to come just from the closeness of their bodies and the pressure of his own cock trapped between their two sweat-slickened bodies.
"Chris."
The faint sigh was barely more than a whisper, but the sound of his name breathed from the lips of his young lover caused Chris's heart to beat even faster. He pushed up on straight arms, staring down into the blue eyes turned nearly black with passion.
"I need you inside me. Please? Fuck me, Chris."
Chris felt his breath catch, and he swallowed hard. He stood up, his hands caressing the strong shoulders and arms, skimming across the tiny nipples and then tracing the indentations of hard-packed muscles over ridges of bone. He used the finger of one hand to trace a circle around the shallow dip of Vin's navel, his other hand pressing into the flat lower belly above Vin's now-erect dick. He loved the feel of that part of Vin's body, so smooth and hairless above the surprisingly soft curls surrounding his cock.
Chris broke contact with Vin's body and the younger man whimpered.
"Shhh..., gonna make it all good."
He went quickly to the counter and grabbed the small bottle of oil they used for salads, opening the cap and pouring a small amount on his hands. He coated Vin's cock, causing the younger man to twist and arch up on the wood.
"Easy...," Chris murmured.
He poured a little more oil on his fingers, coating them thoroughly. Using one hand to push the finely-muscled thighs further apart, he reached under Vin's ass and traced the crack until he found the small puckered opening. His hand soothed along Vin's legs and at the same time he pushed one finger past the tight ring of muscle.
Vin gasped and his breath caught. Chris waited until he could see no signs of distress on Tanner's face. He would have to add at least two more fingers to loosen his lover's body before he could take him.
Chris moved his hand, pulling in and out with his finger until he felt the muscle loosen just slightly. He took out his finger, then pressed back in with two this time. Pressing slowly until the knuckles of his hand pressed against the pubic bone, Chris then twisted with his wrist and he circled the opening to help Vin relax. Chris had to look toward the ceiling, afraid that if he stared at Vin's body or into his eyes he would come before ever entering that tight, incredible heat with his cock.
Vin was moaning and panting, his head thrashing from side to side as his body was overloaded by the sensations Chris was tormenting him with. Chris knew it was time and pressed three fingers into the tight, incredible warmth of his lover's body. He curled his fingers, knowing the instant he found the spot inside Vin that nearly sent him over the edge.
"Chriisss..., Oh, Jesus.... Oh God oh God oh God....," Vin kept up a torrent of words, some of which Chris was pretty sure weren't English or Spanish, his mind fleetingly curious about just how many American Indian languages Vin knew. He was too focused on preparing his lover's body to worry much about it.
Chris knew he wanted four fingers in Vin's opening. His lover was so damn hot and sexy that it drove him wild. Love-making had never in his life been as intense as it was with Tanner, and his pulse quickened while a faint sheen of sweat made his body glisten. He pushed Vin's legs higher with his free hand and both forearms, pressing them up and to the side of his shoulders. That lifted Vin's butt just that much higher, giving him better access to the small opening. He looked down, not able to tear his eyes away any longer from the sight of his hand disappearing into that tight heat.
"Oh, God, Vin. Jesus, Tanner..., Oh God..., So tight.... So hot...., Goddamn, Tanner. So fucking amazing...."
"Fuck me, Chris. Need you.... Fuck me now..."
Larabee nearly lost all sense of reason when that raspy plea sent him over the edge. He pulled his hand out of Vin's body as he reached for the oil, liberally coating his hard, thick cock. The touch of his hand on his own dick nearly made him come, but he gritted his teeth and strained with all the self-control he could muster to hold on just a few moments longer.
Chris gripped the back of Vin's legs, pushing them upward and wide open until they were only a few short inches from the wood of the table. Vin's ass was at the edge of the table, the perfect height for Chris to reach with his feet spread wide for balance.
"Gonna take ya now, Cowboy."
"Fuck me, dammit, Lar'bee. I need ya, Chris. Need ya t' fuck me."
With one hard, steady push, Chris's dick breached the tiny opening and he didn't stop until his cock was buried to the hilt in his lover's body. He stopped there, trying to control his own breathing while letting Vin's body adjust to the pressure and fullness of Chris stretching him. Chris waited until he felt his lover relax and breathe again, but then he couldn't stop.
He pulled out just until the head was trapped by the tight ring of muscle, then pushed slowly and steadily in again until his groin was pressed tightly against Vin's ass. He lifted Vin's body higher and his legs open wider. God, nothing was sexier than Tanner's body. He was bent nearly in half, but there was no sign of obvious strain. It drove Chris wild to see how Vin's legs could be spread open nearly into a split. He could still see Vin's face and his chest with those tiny, perfect nipples, but at the same time have full access to Vin's long, slender legs and his perfect ass.
Chris pulled out again all the way, then this time he slammed hard and fast into Vin's body. The younger man gasped but Larabee quickly determined it wasn't from pain. He used his forearms and leaned forward with his shoulders to keep Vin's legs spread as far apart as possible, and he moved his strong hands down to grip Tanner's ass. He stared with hungry fascination at the sight of his cock appearing and disappearing into Vin's body, watching as his dick vanished and feeling the tightness and heat surrounding it.
The blond couldn't hold on any longer. He pulled out until only the flared head of his cock was inside, and then pounded the full length of his shaft back in. He was alternately pushing Vin's ass tightly together around his dick and then pulling the ass cheeks far apart. Both men were breathing hard and a litany of love and curses filled the room, neither man quite coherent.
The muscles of Chris's arms corded tight, and his own ass cheeks clenched hard as he thrust his hips harder and faster into Vin's body. His hands left bruising marks on Vin's ass as he gripped the hard flesh to hold it steady as he pounded into Vin over and over. He felt the sensations mounting as it seemed as though everything in his body turned to liquid heat and flowed toward his cock. Even his brain felt incapable of coherent thought. When he knew he was coming, he leaned forward to capture Vin's mouth, wanting that additional contact as he came. The motion of his body bent forward pushed Vin's slender ankles up onto the broad shoulders, and the angle of Vin's body combined with the feel of Vin's hard cock trapped between the sweat slick abs sent each man into rigid shocks of orgasm.
"Viiinnnn....!"
Time seemed to stop as each man's body surged into the other. Chris felt the warmth of thick cum spread across his own belly as Vin came a second time. He pressed into the slender body with a hard thrust, held it tightly, then thrust again as his own cum emptied deep inside his lover. The scent of their completion filled the air, and finally they each shuddered one last time. Harsh pants gradually slowed to deep even breaths.
Vin squirmed and a faint moan escaped from his lips.
"Sorry, Cowboy," Chris said, anxiously fearing that he was hurting his younger lover. He grimaced as he pushed up, his arms straightening as he raised his body from where it was lying heavily on the younger man.
"You okay?"
"Never better," Vin grinned, looking exhausted and happy and sexy as hell.
A faint tightening around his mouth and eyes as Chris gently lowered his legs told a different story. They both winced slightly when Chris's softened cock slipped from his lover's body. Chris helped pull Vin up to where he was sitting on the edge of the table, his legs hanging relaxed over the side. The blond pulled Vin's body close to his, his cheek rested on the soft tangled curls where Vin's head was laying on his shoulder. He soothed one hand between the sharp shoulder blades, while his other hand rubbed gentle circles on Vin's lower back where his spine curved.
"Need to get you some Tylenol," Chris murmured.
Vin heard the guilt and apology in his voice, and shook his head.
"I'm okay, Chris. Ya didn't hurt me."
Chris's mouth tightened.
"I might have. I don't ever want you in pain from what we do."
"Hey. Listen to me," Vin pulled back. Flashing blue eyes sought deep green. "Don't ever say yer sorry fer lovin' me, okay? 'M fine."
"I mean it," he repeated firmly, seeing the skepticism of the raised blond eyebrow. "'Sides, if ya ever were hurtin' me, I'd tell ya. An' what means th' world t' me? You would stop. Ain't always had lovers who'd stop, Chris. They'd jist take what they wanted an' didn't matter none if I didn't get what I wanted, or didn't matter none if they w's hurtin' me, 'r doin' somethin' I didn't want 'em to. "
"Oh God, Tanner...."
"Hey, shhh...., don't want t' spoil t'night, okay? If it makes ya feel better, you can get me some Tylenol."
"Deal," Chris smiled. He did worry that he'd been too rough with Vin. The younger man's back gave him problems on a good day, and making love on a hard wood table was probably not the brightest idea he'd ever had. Yet at the sight of his lover - all ocean blue eyes and shiny hair, sexy as hell in white henley that accented his never-faded tan, the soft worn jeans caressing that perfect ass and long, lean legs - he hadn't been able to stop long enough to move them to the bedroom.
Chris grabbed a clean towel from the drawer, and got the water nice and warm before wringing it out and coming over to clean the cum off his partner and then himself before it got dry and sticky. He grabbed up his shirt on the way to the laundry room.
"You want to shower?" he asked Vin, coming back into the kitchen.
He walked in just as Vin was bent over at the waist picking up his jeans from the floor, and Chris caught sight of that naked ass all perfect and open for the taking. He had to pull his eyes away but not before feeling his cock stir just at the sight of Vin's butt. '
'God, do you think you're still eighteen or something?' he thought to himself. Vin could probably get it up for a third time, but it was going to take longer for Chris to recover, no matter how much he might want it to be different.
"Yeah, kind of," Vin said, straightening up and flushing pink when he caught Chris staring at his ass. He smiled shyly and shook his head, adding, "I jist think if we do, dinner's gonna burn."
"I didn't mean shower together."
"Hell, sure ya did, Lar'bee," Vin teased.
"You plum wore me out, Tanner," Chris shook his head. "Even if I wanted to - and I pretty much am sure that I do - I don't think anything's gonna happen for a hour or two at least."
"I might could think a' ways t' perk ya up," Tanner teased.
"Oh my God, Tanner. You're gonna be the death of me. Don't you ever slow down?"
"Don't wanna slow down. Wanna make up fer lost time...., wanna get what I can b'fore...."
He stopped and pressed his lips tightly together.
Chris froze, and practically felt the tension radiating from the younger man's body.
"Before what, Vin?"
"Nothin'."
"Before what, Vin."
The tension in the shoulders deflated and Vin slumped forward.
"'M sorry, Chris. I didn't mean t' say that. I know ya love me. I do," Vin seemed desperate for Chris to believe in. Standing there in just his jeans, hair all tousled and eyes glistening, he looked like a scared kid.
"It's jist..., it jist slipped out, I guess. Kinda an old habit."
"That's an old habit you're going to have to break, Kiddo," Chris told him, crossing the room and enfolding the younger man in his arms. He rubbed the satin smooth skin, frowning at the places where scars from the past marred the perfect silkiness. Vin had a lot more scars that weren't outwardly visible, and his heart ached for every one of them. "I'm in for the long haul here. You're it for me, Tanner. No one else. And I'm not ever lettin' ya go."
"'Kay," Vin smiled shyly.
"Now let's get ready to eat. I'm starving," Chris grinned. He could see Vin relaxing visibly, glad that the tension of the moment was broken. Larabee didn't for a minute believe that this would be the last conversation he'd have about this with his young lover, but at least Vin's insecurities seemed to be coming fewer and further between.
Chris headed to the bedroom to change into black jeans and a dark green crew neck sweater that made him smile as he thought how Vin always told him it made his eyes look an even brighter green. When he came back into the kitchen, he shared a grin with a blushing Vin who was finishing drying the table he'd scrubbed. Nothing could beat the sight of a faintly embarrassed Tanner, and he loved that Vin could be so wild and free in their love-making, and then turn around and be shy and blushing the next.
"I'll set the table," Chris offered, getting a relieved smile from Tanner. Buck would have teased the younger man incessantly, but he wanted them to have a nice dinner and didn't want Vin embarrassed. Hell, if anyone was embarrassed it should be him. He'd walked in the door and couldn't keep from ripping off Tanner's clothes for five minutes.
Besides, setting the table gave him a good view of Vin's butt as he bent over the oven lifting out the meatloaf and baked potatoes, and nobody had a sexier ass than Vin Tanner.
"Good thing you put the potatoes in the oven to bake when you started the meatloaf," Chris commented.
"Guess we didn't have time to peel potatoes after all," Vin agreed, his eyes flashing with laughter. He reached into the refrigerator to bring out a bag of packaged salad, and put a casserole dish of corn in the microwave to steam.
"Damn, this smells great, Vin," Chris told him as they sat down to eat. He took a bite and closed his eyes.
"This is incredible."
Vin looked pleased but a little self-conscious.
"No, I mean it, Vin. My mother used to make meatloaf every Tuesday night, I swear. And it was horrible. I even had it at some of my friends' houses when I'd get invited to stay for dinner, and theirs weren't much better. But this is amazing. Where did you learn to make meatloaf like this?"
"One of my foster moms."
Vin looked thoughtful, his memories obviously carrying him back through time.
"Vin?"
Vin sighed heavily. If there was one thing about Larabee, he was like a bulldog with a bone. Vin knew that there was no avoiding the story once his lover was determined to get to the truth. Damn. Sometimes being in love with an ex-cop and still current law enforcement officer had it's drawbacks. He huffed out a breath.
"Came home from school that day an' w's terrified of a beating," he said, forcing his voice to remain calm and matter-of-fact. "She made me come into the kitchen to help her cook. Think she was figuring I w's about to run off..., wanted t' keep an eye on me."
The corner of Tanner's mouth twitched slightly, and he ducked his head.
"I was, too."
Chris grew still.
"Tell me."
His Texan just sighed heavily, but didn't answer.
"Vin...?"
"Chris..., it's jist... I know it makes you upset, and there ain't nuthin' t' be changed by talkin' on it."
Chris reached over and captured his lover's hand. He rubbed his thumb over the sharp knuckles, then threaded their fingers together and squeezed lightly.
"I still want to know. It was part of your life, and I want to share some of that pain and hurt you went through. I'm thinkin' that maybe by telling me, it might make it just a little bit easier to think about, knowing how much I care about you. How much I care about the boy you were."
Vin sighed heavily, and Chris forced himself to wait patiently. Seemed like Vin did a lot of that whenever they had these kinds of conversations. Finally Vin turned to him and nodded once.
"Jist..., later, okay? After we eat?"
"All right. After we eat."
*7*
The two men enjoyed the meal, and Chris filled Vin in on the latest news and gossip from the office. Josiah was preparing for a profilers' retreat, Nathan was leaving early to take Rain to dinner, and Ezra had spent the better part of the day on the phone with the furniture delivery company about a deep scratch in his new armoire. They laughed at how baffled the customer service representative probably was by Ezra's erudite and convoluted vocabulary. Buck was in pursuit of another conquest, and JD was alternately complaining about Casey wanting more from their relationship, but then pouting when he would spend all evening playing with new computer gadgets and games only to find out later that Casey had gone out with her girlfriends without him. Seemed like JD wanted it both ways, to have Casey home waiting for him when he called, but not wanting to call her if something more technically geeky came along. Buck had been reading JD the riot act of romance when Chris had grabbed his coat and fled the office.
Chris told Vin he'd clean up the kitchen, telling the younger man to go relax after he'd done all the cooking. It didn't take much to store the leftovers and get the load started in the dishwasher.
He went into the next room to find that Vin had started a fire in the fireplace.
"Good night for a fire," Chris said, coming up behind the slender body of his lover. Vin was just standing there, staring at the flames with his arms wrapped tightly about his slender body.
Chris came closer behind him, wrapping his arms around Vin and pulling him back into an embrace. He felt the stiffness in the taut muscles, but was relieved when Vin relaxed back against him. Tanner's hands rested on his forearms. He had to be careful not to spook Vin; it wouldn't take much for him to close up. Then again, the Texan had promised, and nothing was more of a sure guarantee than Vin's word once it had been given.
"You gonna tell me now, pard?"
Vin sighed, and a shudder ran though him. Chris tensed, worried about just how bad this was going to be.
He tugged gently at Vin, and moved over to sit on the coach. He frowned when Vin moved with him, but sat in the corner furthest away, drawing his jean-clad legs up to his chin and wrapping his arms around them.
Chris waited, hoping Vin would start without him asking again, and finally the younger man did.
"I'd only been with them a couple weeks an' I w's still pretty skittish," Vin started, his voice quiet and raspy, yet almost flat and detached. "Th' last place had put me in th' hospital, and I thought I w's facin' th' same thing here."
Chris sucked in a breath and stiffened but kept silent, waiting for Tanner to continue.
"Dan Wilson w's a real big guy, bigger'n J'siah, even. Of course, I w's jist a scrawny little thing, so maybe he wasn't really. Had huge arms, though. He w's a truck driver, hauling logs for a lumber company. He hauled locally so he w's home every night. But his biceps were huge from throwing those heavy log chains up an' over his loads to tighten 'em. I knew if he so much as back-handed me across th' face I'd go flyin' across th' room an' crash inta th' wall, prob'ly breakin' some more ribs."
Vin took a minute and swallowed hard, tightening the hold his arms had around his drawn-up knees.
"Th' foster place I w's in b'fore, th' guy w's real uptight about school. I tried so hard, but I jist couldn't learn. I'd study an' study, but th' words jist jumbled all over th' page. Th' teachers took t' sendin' notes home with me that I had t' git signed. God, I'd git so scared. It jist got worse 'n' worse. Ever' time I had a note, he'd start screamin' at me. He stopped hittin' my face when the school called him about th' bruises an' black eyes, but then he started beatin' me with his belt.
"Shit, day after day after day I'd git a beatin.' Th' last week I w's there he whipped me ever' single day. On Friday I c'ld hardly walk, an' I begged - dammit Chris, I begged - th' teacher not t' send home a note."
"Vin...," Chris whispered hoarsely. He was starting to regret ever asking Tanner for details, and his mind swirled with murderous thoughts of tracking down that teacher and then those foster parents and killing them all.
Vin shook his head but wouldn't look up. He'd started this, and by damn he'd finish.
After a long silence that Chris couldn't take any more, he prompted, "What happened, Vin?"
"I woke up in th' hospital," Vin said, his voice flat and devoid of emotion.
There was a long silence while Chris struggled with what he could possibly say to that. 'I'm sorry' just didn't seem fucking nearly enough. Finally Vin swallowed hard and took a deep, shaky breath before continuing. The stress and anxiety the younger man was going through was making his Texas drawl even deeper and more pronounced.
"When I got out, the social worker took me back t' th' group home fer a couple weeks until I w's pretty well healed. She came in one day an' said they'd found another couple who would take me. I didn't say anything..., I couldn't. They never listened t' me anyway. But I w's terrified t' go. Th' group home weren't no picnic, but at least I knew what I w's dealin' with. Seemed like ever' new foster place w's as bad if not worse than th' one b'fore, but it w's always a new an' diff'rent kind a' worse.
"She took me over that Saturday morning, and when I saw them I thought I was gonna pass out. Sandy w's pretty small, had blonde curly hair an' seemed real friendly. Dan, though, w's huge. All I c'ld see w's this big man with bulging muscles an' hard hands. I know I must'a turned white as a sheet, 'cause right away Sandy w's runnin' t' git me a glass a' water an' makin' me sit down."
"But..., they were nice, right? You liked them?" Chris asked hopefully.
"Yeah," Vin sighed and his mouth quirked up faintly. "But I didn't know that then. Now that I think about it, I'm pretty sure Dan knew I w's afraid of him. He w's real good about that. He'd never come toward me, he'd always be real slow an' take care not t' spook me. He had a big, booming laugh, but th' first time I heard it I flinched back so hard I practically put myself through th' wall. I couldn't hardly look at them I w's so embarrassed, but I snuck a glance an' their eyes w's so soft an' I jist knew they c'ld tell my heart w's racin' a mile a minute.
"Their house was in another school district, so I had another new school t' try t' fit into. I wasn't doin' good. Hell, I never did good. But it w's a couple weeks b'fore they sent a note with me. I tried t' git Sandy t' sign it, but she told me I had t' show Dan.
"I must'a looked like I w's about t' throw up 're somethin'. She told me t' leave my homework for later an' come inta th' kitchen with her. She was makin' meatloaf, an' she had me helpin' her. After I jumped an' flinched at ever' little sound or movement, she saw I w's shakin' and she took th' knife away from where I w's choppin' onions. It w's a wonder I didn't slice through m' hand. She set me t' breakin' th' eggs an' doin' th' mixin'."
Vin's voice trailed off, and Chris could tell he was lost in the powerful memories of that time.
The skinny kid with the long tangled hair and startlingly blue eyes was visibly shaking, but Sandy kept a good eye on him. She knew that the tormented young boy who had been entrusted to their care had been beaten and abused in the past. While the social services people hadn't given them many details, it didn't take much to see how scared he was and how ready to bolt at the first hint of a threat. All she could do was be patient, keep him occupied and with her, and wait until her husband came home.The sound of a pickup truck pulling in caused the teenager to freeze, his eyes widening while his body tensed.
"Vin, it's okay," she soothed. "I promise."
She couldn't tell whether he believed her or not, but he certainly didn't relax.
"Hey there, I'm home!" Dan announced, coming into the kitchen and kicking off his boots.
Sandy swept over for a kiss, reaching out her hand to take his coffee thermos.
"Hi, Vin," he smiled warmly, his eyes taking in the wariness and tension in the boy. The kid was clearly trembling, and Dan could sense his fear and panic.
This was going to take patience, since something was obviously wrong.
"How was school?"
Tanner flinched as though he was shot.
"Dan, Vin has something he needs to show you," Sandy said quietly, catching his eye and nodding toward the boy.
"Okay," Dan nodded, looking to his wife curiously.
She merely shook her head, but raised her eyebrows knowingly and shooed them out of the kitchen. She knew that if anyone could reach this abused boy and help him overcome his brutal past, it would be her husband. Not that it would be easy, but his kind soul and never-ending patience would be put to the test with their foster son.
"Go on now, both of you. Let me get this in the oven so that we can eat."
Vin looked as though he were going to throw up, and Sandy's heart ached for him. She knew that everything would be all right; they just had to be gentle and patient until Vin believed it. They'd had foster kids before, but never one to reject so intensely all attempts to get him to trust them.
Dan walked ahead into the small room off the front entrance that could have been an extra bedroom but instead had been turned into an office. They kept their records in filing cabinets, paid bills at the desk, and Vin was allowed to use the computer for his homework.
Dan went up to the desk, but merely leaned against the wood, folding his arms loosely across his chest.
"So what's this thing you need to show me, son," his voice low and gentle.
Wide, frightened blue eyes flew up to meet kind brown ones.
"Vin," Dan pressed, trying to pull the boy's attention back to him.
The big man thought maybe his crossed arms were perceived as a threatening gesture, so he rested his hands on his belt, fingers curling around it near the buckle. Vin gasped, his panicked blue eyes snapping up in pure terror. Dan could see the boy starting to hyperventilate, the vein in his neck pounding wildly.
Suddenly it clicked for the man.
The belt. Vin thought Dan was going to beat him.
For the past two weeks their new foster son had been nearly silent, ghosting through the house as if treading on eggshells. He never spoke unless asked a question, was polite but timid and nervous. He would never express an opinion even when pressed for something so small as his preference for dinner, or choice of a television show to watch. It was almost as if he was afraid that he would be punished for the wrong answer - or punished for daring to want something at all. Now as Dan took in the frantic blue eyes, the trembling body, the face gone stark white, he realized the truth.
Vin Tanner was terrified.
'God, what's been done to this kid to make him so scared?' he thought to himself, heartsick at learning the truth. Vin was quiet, polite, obviously anxious to please when he wasn't trying to vanish into the woodwork. 'How could anyone see such fear in those expressive eyes and still hit him? How could anyone beat this boy?'
Dan knew he had to get Vin to calm down. The boy looked one breath away from bolting. The social worker had warned them that Tanner was a habitual runaway; now Dan wasn't so sure the boy didn't have good cause to run.
"Vin..? Vin...."
Panicked blue eyes darted toward the door, and the tension increased in the skinny frame.
"Vincent Michael Tanner."
Finally the anxious, scared eyes met his.
"Vin, you need to breathe. You're okay... It's gonna be okay. No one will hurt you. I'm not going to hit you, Vin. Listen to me, son. You need to calm down now. I'm not going to hit you. I promise. We don't hurt kids here."
Dan kept up a soothing litany, his soft voice and gentle tone gradually breaking through the fear and panic. He was relieved as slowly Vin seemed to settle down a little. His face lost that look of pure terror, and he got a little color back. It couldn't help but remind Dan of his days on his grandfather's ranch, watching the hired hands tame the new horses rounded up from the range. He grandfather believed that gentling a horse worked much better than 'breaking' them, and Dan truly appreciated those lessons he'd learned without even realizing it at the time.
Finally Vin stopped the shallow panting that Dan feared would cause him to hyperventilate. He swallowed hard, and a little more of the tension eased from the slender body as Vin slowly and gradually began to feel less threatened.
Dan wondered if Vin would ever trust them enough to tell them what had been done to him to make him so anxious and scared around them. He doubted it. All they could do now was try to get him to trust them and believe it when they promised not to hurt him.
"Now," he said when Vin's breathing slowed further and the wild look left his eyes. "Show me what you brought home. It'll be all right..., whatever it is. I promise."
Big, sky blue eyes met his and stared for a long moment. Finally the boy seemed to come to a decision, and he took a deep breath.
"I sure hope you ain't lyin' t' me," his voice was a soft rasp.
"I'm not," Dan vowed solemnly. "We don't hurt kids, and we don't lie to them, either."
Vin reached a thin arm behind his back and pulled out a crumpled piece of paper from the pocket of his too loose jeans. No matter how slim of a size they tried to find for Tanner, in order to get the length needed for his long legs and arms, Vin's clothes still hung on his skinny frame. Hopefully they'd get him eating better - as soon as they could convince him they weren't resentfully counting every mouthful of food in order to make him work it off to earn his keep.
Long, bony fingers held out the note, and as soon as Dan took it Vin took a hurried step backwards. He stood there, wary and watchful, as Dan read the note.
"This is it?" he finally asked, frowning.
"Yes, sir," Tanner's voice barely above a raspy whisper.
"Nothing else?" Dan was still clearly puzzled.
The slender body tensed and Vin looked toward the floor, but Dan could see the worry and uneasiness in his face as fearful blue eyes darted up watchfully.
"No, sir."
"Vin, all this note says is that you failed a spelling test."
Dan heard the harsh, choked gasp as the boy froze.
"Vin, I just have to sign the note, okay? That's all there is to it."
Dan moved away from the desk enough to twist and look for a pen.
"No!"
The big man was startled by the frantic plea, as the skinny boy stood there trembling and shaking his head, eyes huge in the delicately-boned face. Dan turned back and took a step toward Vin, only to freeze in place before the situation got any worse.
"Get away from me!" Vin's voice was shaking. "Don't you touch me!"
"Vin, I'm not going to hurt you. I'm not."
"No...., no, please...."
Vin's mind flooded with disjointed images of memory: hard hands reaching for him, faces twisted and snarling, painfully bruising fingers clenched deeply and painfully into his thin arms. Scattered visions swirled through his mind of vicious taunts and hurtful words, memories of being hit with fists and belts, cigarette burns..., being tied and beaten..., scenes of brutal beatings that left him bruised and bloody and sometimes unconscious. Always different hands hurting him, different belts, different angry faces and harsh voices shouting and yelling. But always the same result: pain, fear, desperate aching loneliness, and heartbreaking damage to his soul as well as his body.
Dan noticed the faint sheen of sweat breaking out on the stark-white face, and Vin's harsh, panting breaths increased until the big man feared that Vin would hyperventilate to the point he might pass out.
"Vin..., Vin, it's okay. I told you, I won't beat you. No matter what, I'm not going to hit you, Vin. See? I'm over here. I'm not coming toward you, Vin. I'll stay right here. But you can believe me, son. I'm not going to hit you...., I promise you can trust me. Calm down now, okay? Just calm down...."
Finally Dan felt like Vin was getting his breathing under control, but feared that as soon Vin's legs felt less shaky he might try to flee. Dan knew he had to stop it before this time Tanner really did run off.
"Let me ask you something," he said gently, keeping eye contact with the boy and keeping his face calm and reassuring. "Did you study?"
Vin's mouth tightened and Dan saw the sadness that flooded his eyes before the boy stared hard at the ground.
"Yes, sir."
"Did you do your best?"
This time Vin just nodded, staring hard at the floor.
"Vin, look at me."
He waited until the boy raised his eyes.
"Did you do your best?"
"Yes, sir."
"Well, then," Dan smiled warmly, but also a little sadly. "That's all you can do. I'm never going to beat you - at all, ... ever, but certainly not when you're trying your best. I think this note is just from the teacher to let us know what areas you may need help in. I'll help you with your homework tonight after dinner, okay?"
A bony shoulder shrugged.
"Won't matter none," Vin's voice was low and Dan could hear the shame and bitterness in it. "'M too stupid t' learn."
"Who says you're stupid?" Dan asked, trying to rein in his temper. The last thing this skittish kid needed was to be startled by his anger. The boy would never know that it wasn't directed at him, but rather at the other adults who'd obviously made him believe he wasn't worth their efforts.
"Everyone. Teachers. Social workers. The foster places."
"Well, they're wrong," Dan said firmly. "You're smart, and you can learn. If there's something that's keeping you from reading or learning, you might need your eyes checked, or have something like dyslexia that makes it hard to learn. We'll get you tested by the school."
Vin shook his head stubbornly.
"They won't. Th' state won't pay fer none a that, not fer no charity case like me. Hell, they make it clear they hate payin' fer th' hospital, even when it w's th' places they sent me that put me there."
Dan winced internally, but managed not to let his frustration show on his face. The boy had been brutalized physically, mentally, and emotionally, but how much worse to find that the very people entrusted to help these kids were only adding to his pain by making it clear he wasn't worth the money or time or energy to help.
"They will if I have anything to say about it," Dan vowed. "And if they won't pay for it, I sure as hell will. That's a promise, Vin Tanner."
Vin stared at Dan Wilson a long moment. It was almost as if those sad, ancient eyes could see into his very soul. It was like nothing he'd ever experienced.
The big man was finally rewarded by the first true smile from the scared, skinny boy entrusted to their care, and it gave Vin's nearly gaunt face a rare sweetness. ''Wow,' he thought to himself, 'He smiles like that more often and he'll be driving the girls wild. Sandy and I will have a whole other set of issues to deal with when the girls start throwing themselves at him. Still, it's an awfully satisfying sight.'
"....Damn, Chris," Vin chuckled softly. "We went back t' the kitchen, an' nothin' had ever tasted so good t' me as that meatloaf did that night. Sandy had me help her cook every night, 'r help her bake cookies. It wasn't until years later that I realized she w's helping me with my schoolwork. She'd pretend her hands w's too covered in flour and I had t' read th' cookbook to her, or she'd double th' batch of cookies an' make me tell her how many teaspoons of baking soda or salt that would be, an' make me figure out th' measurements."
"They sound like great people," Chris agreed. "They helped with your schooling?"
"Oh, yeah. Dan insisted the school get me tested, an' that was where they finally found out I was dyslexic. Helped me with my readin' an' math every night, too. God, I about worshiped him. He took me everywhere an' introduced me as his son. I mean, I knew I weren't, of course, but that meant a lot t' me fer him t' do that. Must a' told everyone about me ahead a' time, 'cause none a' th' old guys at th' hardware store or th' diner even blinked an eye."
"Wow."
Vin's expression softened.
"For the first time I had a foster place that I started to feel safe in. I liked Dan a lot, but Sandy was somethin' else. She always called him 'Danny.' He would come in an' dance with her in th' kitchen, singing 'You're The One That I Want.' He had a real terrible voice, but Sandy would just laugh. They were appalled to find out that I'd never seen th' movie 'Grease.' Dan went right out an' rented it, an' Sandy made popcorn. That started a Sunday movie night tradition."
Chris watched Vin's face as the emotions from past memories were reflected in the expressive eyes.
"That w's th' last good home I was in," Vin concluded. "After that, well....."
Chris tried to think of the timeline. He remembered every story he could pry out of his reluctant Texan, but also remembered every hint when Vin let something slip, or tried to figure out from his cries which former nightmare was being relived in Vin's dreams. The next foster home might well have been the one to make him turn to the streets, to take his chance being homeless rather than in the clutches of a brutal foster parent.
"What happened that you couldn't stay?"
Vin's expression tightened.
"Babe...?"
"There w's a trucker strike. I didn't really understand it; think it had something t' do with th' oil business. It wasn't supposed to effect Dan. He didn't drive an oil tanker or for an oil company, but jist a lumber company. He got held up on a job one day because the sawmill had broken down, an' he w's coming home at night after dark."
Vin stopped, and Chris held his breath.
"Some of th' striking oil tank truckers were waiting on a bridge overpass. Guess they didn't see that he w's hauling logs, or maybe they didn't care. They dropped a cement block off th' bridge an' it crashed through his windshield. Nearly killed him."
"Oh my God."
"He w's in th' hospital, an' the social workers came an' pulled me out of school. I never even got to see him, or say good-bye to Sandy."
Chris felt his heart clench at the outright cruelty of what that would have done to a young, teenage Vin.
"Goddamn it to hell, Tanner. How the fuck could they do that to you?"
One slender shoulder just shrugged and he shook his head.
"It was jist th' way it was. I w's sent back t' th' boys home fer maybe a month, then they said they had another place to take me."
"And that next one...?" Chris asked softly, and somewhat fearfully.
Vin's face closed, his expression distant and detached.
"Pard?"
"No."
Flat. Hard.
"Hey, Cowboy," Chris soothed. He reached his hand over and rubbed his thumb across the knuckles of Vin's tightly clenched fist, trying to draw Vin back to him.
Finally Vin blinked, and raised his eyes to meet soft green ones. He stared a long moment, fighting to chase the unhappy memories away and lose himself in the love and strength pouring from the older man.
"Not t'night, okay Cowboy?" Tanner nearly whispered. "Jist..., not t'night."
"Sure Vin. It's okay. Come over here?" he invited.
Vin allowed himself to be pulled next to Chris, and he curled into the tight embrace of his lover's arms. Vin pressed his face to the strong chest, soothed by the sound of the heartbeat steady and sure. His sock covered feet were pulled up tight against his butt, and for long moments the only sound in the room was the crackle of wood and flames from the fireplace.
"I ..., I really wanted t' stay there, Chris," Vin's voice was barely above a whisper. Tanner sounded so damn young.
Chris's heart clenched and he felt an overwhelming sorrow for the sad, lonely boy that Vin had been. His arms tightened around the slender body.
"I know."
"They w's so good t' me. They w's th' first ones t' treat me good. Folks didn't usually want th' older kids. Jist little ones that were cute."
Chris's mouth twitched. He thought Vin was damn cute, especially when he got riled. But he knew that wasn't what Vin was talking about, and he could well imagine prospective foster parents only wanting to sign up for younger children they could cuddle and control easier.
Vin sighed, and one shoulder shrugged. "Should'a known better'n t' hope t' stay. I knew better, too. Nothing good ever lasts."
"Hey," Chris frowned. "We'll last."
Vin shook his head stubbornly and sighed heavily.
"Ya cain't promise that, Chris."
"Listen to me, Tanner," Chris said sternly, taking Vin by the arms and twisting him around gently until he could look into the younger man's eyes. "I know that our jobs are dangerous, and maybe we can't do any more than everything in our power to stay out of the way of the bad guys and bullets. But nothing, and I mean nothing, is ever going to make me stop loving you. You're it for me, Vincent Michael Tanner. Don't you ever doubt that. And if something horrible happens, you're not gonna be alone, Cowboy. You're not that scared little boy any more."
"I know...." Vin frowned.
"And one more thing," Chris continued, holding up his hand to stop Vin's protest. "You got all the guys lookin' after you now. Shit, Bucklin on a good day can be mighty scary, and he'll take real good care of you. He was a good friend to me, and you'll never find a more caring person to look after you. Hell, you got Josiah ready to practically adopt you. And frankly, I'm not sure I trust Ezra not to make a move on you the minute I'm out of the picture."
"Chris!" Vin yelped, a hint of a smile creeping across his features.
"I'm just saying. I've seen him looking at you , and we just may have to continue that conversation later. If all else fails, I've seen the way the girls in the secretarial pool look after you - and look at your ass. Hell, half the guys in the motor pool do, too."
Chris smiled to see Vin's eyebrow raise and a crooked little grin grace that generous mouth.
"And Jesus, Tanner, Miss Nettie will never let her boy be alone ever again, and right there is one damn formidable force of nature."
"Vin," Chris's hand reached out to raise that strong chin, and intense green eyes caught and held the wide blue ones. "I want you to know - to believe - that if anyone ever hurts you, if I have to I'll come back from the depths of hell to make them pay for it."
Vin gazed up into the compassionate, love-filled eyes.
"You'd do that, too, Lar'bee, wouldn't ya?" Vin breathed.
"I absolutely would, Vin Tanner. We ride the river together, Cowboy. That's a promise. You and I will always be together," Chris smiled faintly.
"Yeah, Chris," he breathed. "We will."
The taller man gathered his younger lover into a warm embrace, but this time there wasn't the heat of passion but instead comfort and caring and love. He leaned his head down and nestled into the soft curls, and smiled when he felt Vin's arms tighten around his waist.
Several long minutes later they pulled apart, and Vin smiled up almost shyly.
"Sorry I fell apart."
Chris shook his head. "For one thing, that was hardly 'falling apart.' For another thing, don't ever be sorry. Not for what you feel, and never for sharing those memories and feelings with me."
"'Kay," Vin smiled shyly, and Chris delighted in the deep dimples. He rested his head on Chris's shoulder, and Chris rubbed his cheek on the soft curls.
"Good."
They both stared into the flames for several long moments, arms around each other, relaxing to the soft snap of burning wood and the flicker of flames.
Vin was starting to relax, and as Chris rubbed comforting circles on his back he could feel the younger man start to lose the tension in his tightly strung body. They both needed a distraction to pull back from the thought of what came after Vin was forced away, and get back to the happier memories of his time with the Wilsons.
Vin yawned. Chris grinned affectionately.
"Tired?"
"Nah. Well, maybe a little. Seems like I slept half the day, though," Vin admitted. He was tired of being sick. It made him restless, but then he was still tiring easily.
"Do you feel like watching TV? Or you want to read?" Chris finally asked, giving Vin another hug.
"Read to me?" he agreed, and Chris could hear the relief in his voice. Vin hated to dwell on the past, and while Chris thought it was important to get Tanner to share anything he was willing to share about his childhood, he also didn't want Vin to become too stressed over it. It was hard on Vin to talk about, and almost as hard for Chris to hear. Just knowing how brutal his young lover's life had been could almost make Chris physically ill.
Vin untangled himself and went to the kitchen for another beer for each of them, while Chris added another small log to the fire and found the book on the end table. Even though Chris had a great satellite TV package, sometimes the two of them lost interest in just watching television - even sports - night after night. One evening a couple months ago, everyone was leaving work after quitting time, but Chris was staying to finish up some paperwork and Vin was settling in to wait for him. Josiah was partway out the door before turning around and coming back. He went to his desk and returned with a heavy novel, smiling down at the team's sharpshooter.
"Just in case you get tired of reading your guns and ammunition magazines, Vin," he had grinned. "I finished this last night and thought you might enjoy it. The author writes a lot of really good crime and suspense novels, and this might give you something different to do while you wait for the boss."
Vin had been surprised and touched that Josiah had given this to him to share, and he promised to take good care of the book. Josiah had chuckled and told him that he knew he would; just take his time and enjoy it, no hurry to return it. Chris had found Tanner engrossed in it when he emerged from his office over an hour later. Vin had excitedly described the plot during the ride home, and Chris had tried not to smile at the younger man's enthusiasm.
When Vin had curled up with the book again as soon as their evening chores with the horses and the dinner dishes were done, Chris had a moment of inspiration. Rather than watch Vin read the book, then have a turn to read it himself, he made the suggestion that they read it aloud to each other. Vin had been stunned, but then gave Chris one of his sweet little-boy smiles that never failed to take Chris's breath away.
An unexpected bonus had been an improvement in Vin's reading. He had been a little self-conscious at first about reading aloud to Chris, worried and a little ashamed that he would stumble over words that Chris would easily breeze through. But Chris never prompted him or rushed him, just waited patiently and calmly. Chris's easy acceptance and lack of pressure lessened Vin's anxiety, and soon he was so caught up in the story that the words just seemed to flow.
Chris never tired of hearing Vin's voice, but they also took turns reading to each other. The older man knew that Vin had warm memories of his mother holding him and reading to him, but after she died when he was five, Chris was pretty sure that type of experience was few and far between, if it happened at all.
Chris's mind came back to the present as Vin came into the room, holding out one of the beers to Chris. He looked at the fire, then Chris as he went toward the couch across from the fireplace.
"What are you grinning about?" Chris asked him, seeing the look on Vin's face.
"Jist thinkin' that we're like a little old married couple, settlin' in on a Friday night with a book by th' fire."
Chris answered his grin with one of his own. "Kinda like the sound of that, myself. What about you?"
"Me? Wouldn't want t' be anywhere else, Cowboy."
"You don't miss going out on Friday night?" Chris pressed a little anxiously. He'd gone through a period of worrying about the fifteen-year age difference between them afraid he was stifling his much younger lover. "Sure you wouldn't rather be playing pool and hanging around with the guys? Maybe going out to dinner and a movie?"
Vin frowned, looking thoughtfully at Chris.
"We do that enough, Cowboy. It's not like we don't see them a lot. We head to the Saloon after work maybe more times than not, especially on Friday nights. But when I was in the army or the Marshalls, I got enough of that lifestyle. I liked it okay; had friends to meet up with. Tried t' find someone special sometimes, but bars...., well, you know. Bounty huntin' w's weird, so goin' to a bar on Friday 'r Saturday w's more about not bein' alone starin' at th' walls in whatever dumpy motel room I w's storin' my things in that week. Hell, I'm damn glad those days are over. Its real nice jist bein' home."
Vin stopped and grew still. His blue eyes looked huge and shimmered in the reflected light of the fire. He stared at Chris, and Larabee grew a little concerned.
"Vin?"
"Jist..., never had a 'home' before. I mean, I like goin' out. I like hangin' out with th' guys an' everything. But, being here like this, havin' a home.... Havin' a place that's really ours an' not jist bein' in an apartment by myself..... I cain't tell ya what that means t' me, Chris. Bein' here like this, with you, readin' by the fire.... Ain't no place in th' world I'd rather be. Feel like I got me a little slice of heaven right here with you."
Chris crossed the room and enveloped Vin in his strong arms, reassured when he felt the younger man lean into the embrace and circle his waist with his arms, hands clutching at his back. Vin had spent years of his life completely on his own with no one to care about him or watch out for him. Chris couldn't begin to image what that was like.
"Sometimes I can't believe I got so lucky," Vin whispered, his voice a soft rasp.
"Sometimes I can't believe I got so lucky," Chris tightened his embrace.
The two men stood like that for a long moment, each cherishing the intensity of their love for each other. The storm that had been forecast choose that moment to let loose, and the pounding of rain against the windows provided contrast to the gentle crackle from the fireplace.
The tension was broken when Vin snorted quietly.
Chris pulled back and looked down questioningly into laughing blue eyes.
"What?"
"Oh, I was jist thinkin' about some a' them bad guys we've hunted and captured. You come stormin' into them warehouses looking like th' wrath of doom, an' half of them piss their pants jist from th' glare of terror alone. I'd almost pay money t' see th' looks on their faces if they w's t' see you like this t'night, th' two of us curled up on th' couch, layin' in front of th' fire, you runnin' yer fingers through m' hair an' readin' t' me ...."
Chris laughed out loud.
"Jesus, Tanner! 'Wrath of Doom'? 'Glare of Terror'? Sounds like you've been readin' those comic books of JD's again that he's got laying all over the office."
"...'Specially if they w's t' see you when ya got yer readin' classes on...," Vin teased, his eyes flashing with wicked humor.
"Goddamn, scrawny-assed, pain in the butt Texan. I'm about ready to 'Glare of Terror' you!" Chris snarled, trying to sound threatening but failing miserably in the face of the boyish laughter of his younger lover. God, he loved it when Tanner was like this.
"I think it's sweet," Vin teased. "You know you love me."
Chris reached over and swatted Vin's ass.
"Are we gonna read or not?" he growled.
Vin twisted suddenly and placed a gentle kiss on his lips, and Chris softened immediately.
"Read."
Soon Chris was settled into the corner of the long, wide couch, his beer on a coaster on the end table holding the lamp. Vin settled his long body next to him, using Chris's thigh as a pillow, his knees slightly bent to bring his warm sock-clad feet up on the sofa cushions. Chris opened the book to the page marked from where they had stopped last time, and soon they were both engrossed in the story. Vin stared at the flames, every bit of tension gone from his body as he reveled in the closeness and love of his partner. Chris carded long fingers through the soft curls, and Vin fairly purred with pleasure as the words of the story flowed over him.
No. There was no place on earth either one of them would rather be on a Friday night.
*7*
"You about ready to call it a night?" Chris asked at the end of a chapter, brushing the hair back from Vin's face. He'd felt the younger man grow heavier as he relaxed, and figured that Vin was having a hard time staying awake. His still-healing body needed rest. Between the book, the fire in the fireplace, the sound of rain pounding against the windows, and Chris stroking his fingers through his hair, it was a wonder Vin wasn't already asleep.
Vin turned on the couch and stretched, yawning hugely, which made Chris chuckle.
Sleepy blue eyes looked up at him, and Chris leaned down and kissed that lush mouth lightly.
Tanner pushed himself off the couch, and Chris stood and stretched, twisting to loosen his back. Vin checked that the house was secured for the night, while Chris made sure the fire was out. Vin stared at Chris as he knelt by the fireplace. The glow from the dying embers turned his blond strands to burnished gold, and Vin's cock twitched. The sight of powerful shoulders and trim waist turned the twitch to downright interest.
Vin quirked an eyebrow and deep dimples appeared as Chris caught him staring.
"Gonna show me again how much yer always gonna care about me?" he asked. There was a certain teasing tone to Vin's voice, but also an underlying hesitation and insecurity. It wasn't often that Vin needed this kind of reassurance. Reliving his memories of his traumatic childhood was stressful, even with Chris's support and love. Chris guessed that Vin's recent illness had weakened some of his natural independence, and brought out a vulnerability that was rare for the younger man.
Chris smiled at him, holding his gaze for a long moment and letting him see all the love and the honesty and the passion that he felt for the younger man. Then Chris's grin turned to a feral leer.
"Hell, yeah, I am. And then I'm gonna fuck you through the mattress."
Vin gasped and his eyes darkened with desire. His breathing quickened and he got a wicked sparkle to his expression.
"Well, shit, Cowboy..., what the hell are we waitin' for? I'll race ya, Old Man."
Peals of laughter caught Chris by surprise, a wonderful, carefree, boyish sound.
"I'll 'old man' you!" he threatened. He took off after his Texan, but almost immediately slowed his pace. He would catch up in plenty of time, and make Tanner pay for his taunts. Right now it was just too tempting to stare at that perfect ass running up the stairs in front of him.
Yep. It was a perfect Friday night.
The End